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Friday, December 9, 2016

Is sex addiction real? Maybe not, therapists say

6:30 AM Bilal Muazin No comments

summer portrait of a kissing young adult couple, back lit

Young couple kissing.(Photo: fotografixx, Getty Images)

Claiming a sex addiction may be a go-to for misbehaving celebrities and politicians, but from a science perspective there isn't enough study to prove sex addiction isÂ real, according to a professional organization of sex educators and therapists.

There is not enough empirical evidence to classify sex addiction or porn addiction as a mental disorder, the The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT)Â said in a statement to members lastÂ week. TheÂ organization saidÂ that current sex addiction therapy and counseling is not adequately informed by human sexuality and thus not supported as a standard practice by the organization.

While the organization is in no way saying that people donâ€™t experience real physical, psychological and health consequences from their sexual urges, sex addiction is an â€œoversimplification of a complex area of human sexual behavior,â€ Douglas Braun-Harvey, a sexual health author and psychotherapist, said in a statementÂ Dec.9.

â€œI think the most important thing to remember is that there are people who are suffering from their sexual behavior being out of control, but what ends up happening is that the suffering, the fear and the consequences it brings to their careers and families get prematurely and very quickly labeled sex addiction,â€ said Braun-Harvey, who is one of the authors of the AASECT statement.

USA TODAY

Q & A: Is Anthony Weiner a sex addict?

AASECT certification is needed in many states to become a sexual counselor, according to the organizationâ€™s website.Â So the organizationâ€™s stance on sex addiction sends an important message, especially at a time when sex addiction therapy is constantly in the headlines.

In early November, former politician Anthony Weiner was spotted riding a horse at a treatment facility that offers equine therapy for sex addiction, AP reported. Â And a quick Google search shows sex addiction therapists and treatment facilities are plentiful.

Joseph Burgo, a clinical psychologist, and author of >The Narcissist You Know told USA TODAY in August that sex addiction is controversial for a number of reasons.

"When it's something like alcohol you are addicted to or drugs, that's one thing, but when it's food or sex, those are normal human needs, so it's more controversial," he said, adding that little research has been done on sex addiction.

"Addiction implies a biochemical basis, and there are not sufficient studies to demonstrate that," Burgo said.

Follow Mary Bowerman on Twitter: @MaryBowermanÂ

Read or Share this story: http://usat.ly/2h55WIi

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Thursday, December 8, 2016

Jenna Dewan Tatum Dishes on Sex Life with Channing Tatum

3:00 PM Bilal Muazin No comments

Itâ€™s safe to say Jenna Dewan Tatum and Channing Tatum know how to keep their marriage spicy.

Dewan Tatum isnâ€™t shy about discussing the coupleâ€™s romantic relationship in the January issue of >Cosmopolitan, revealing, â€œWe definitely have a very happy and healthy [sex life].â€

â€œâ€¦Iâ€™ve always been a very sexual person,â€ the 36-year-old admits, adding, â€œSomething about being a dancer connects you to your physical body. Itâ€™s primal, earthy, sexual energy by nature. You feel your body in a certain way.â€

She says that â€œChanning is very much the same way. Heâ€™s very in tune with that.â€

The couple celebrated their seventh wedding anniversary this past July. They tied the knot just three years after meeting on the set of their 2006 movie Step Up.

Despite instant attraction, the romance took some time to develop while they were filming the dance movie. In fact, Dewan Tatum says they tip-toed around their feelings: â€œIt was two nights of being weird.â€

â€œWe hadnâ€™t even kissed. And then he went out partying with a bunch of dancers,â€ she recalls. â€œHis room was right above mine, and he came down drunk with a sombrero on, banging on my door.â€

RELATED VIDEO: Jenna Dewan Tatum Stresses the Importance of Date Nights with Channing Tatum

Dewan Tatum reveals that she had previously told the hunky star, 36, he didnâ€™t seem ready to begin a new romance, but on that night, â€œHe was like, â€˜I couldnâ€™t stop thinking about you. Letâ€™s do this. I just want to be with you.â€™ From that point forward, we were together.â€ Now, the pair are happy parents to daughter Everly, 3.

Eric Ray Davidson/Cosmopolitan The January issue of Cosmopolitan hits newsstands on Dec. 13. "

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Jenna Dewan Tatum Dishes on Sex Life with Channing Tatum

2:00 PM Bilal Muazin No comments

Itâ€™s safe to say Jenna Dewan Tatum and Channing Tatum know how to keep their marriage spicy.

She says that â€œChanning is very much the same way. Heâ€™s very in tune with that.â€

The couple celebrated their seventh wedding anniversary this past July. They tied the knot just three years after meeting on the set of their 2006 movie Step Up.

RELATED VIDEO: Jenna Dewan Tatum Stresses the Importance of Date Nights with Channing Tatum

Eric Ray Davidson/Cosmopolitan The January issue of Cosmopolitan hits newsstands on Dec. 13. "

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Saturday, December 10, 2016

Britain's 'first gay surrogate dads' want girl triplets via sex selection process illegal in UK

5:00 PM Bilal Muazin No comments

Britainâ€™s first gay couple to father children through surrogacy have sparked heated debate over their plans to have have triplet daughters via a sex-selection process that is illegal in the UK.

Barrie and Tony Drewitt-Barlow want three girls to add to their four sons and a daughter. They plan to conceive the triplets through embryo sex selection, and will do so in the US, where the practice is legal.

The coupleâ€™s youngest children, six-year-old twins Jasper and Dallas, were conceived thanks to a batch of embryos, of which there are still ten remaining in a Californian fertility clinic.

They first became fathers in 1999 Credit: rob bodman

The embryos were created using the coupleâ€™s sperm and the eggs of a Brazilian model. She was paid Â£50,000 by the couple for her eggs after they spotted her on a catwalk.

Barrie outlined the coupleâ€™s plan to pick the female embryos from those ten. They will then be implanted in the womb of a surrogate mother.

â€œThis is baby trafficking, a skewing of the natural order,â€ said a spokeswoman for Christian Concern. â€œChildren are a blessing and a gift, not objects that we select from a showroom.â€

Lisa Ann Magerman, an obstetrics blogger and nurse, raised safety concerns. â€œTriplet pregnancies are very high-risk to begin with,â€ she said â€œSex selection signals they care more about balanced numbers than four lives.â€

Triplet pregnancies are very high-risk to begin with. Sex selection signals they care more about balanced numbers than four livesLisa Ann Magerman, obstetrics blogger and nurse

But not all observers are against the practice of sex selection. In a report into the ethics of gender preference, Stephen Wilkinson, a professor of bioethics at Lancaster, said: â€œWe didn't find any ethical arguments sufficient to justify a blanket ban on these people seeking sex selection.â€

There is â€œtoo much testosteroneâ€ in the Drewitt-Barlow household, said Barrie, adding that he was not too old to be a father again. â€œI need to have another princess in my life â€" or two or three,â€ he told newspapers.

The Drewitt-Barlows, who live in Essex, Â first became fathers in 1999. Each of them fertilised an egg from the same woman, resulting in the birth, thanks to a surrogate mother, of Saffron and Aspen, half-siblings who are both now 17.

They were followed by Orlando, 13, and then Jasper and Dallas. Saffron told newspapers that her fathers are â€œway too oldâ€ for more children.

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Thursday, December 8, 2016

Metropolitan police to investigate sexual abuse claims at London clubs | Football

3:30 PM Bilal Muazin No comments

The Metropolitan police has launched an investigation into historical sexual abuse claims involving London football clubs, becoming the 21st force across the country to have begun similar inquiries into teams in their areas.

Britainâ€™s largest police force said specialist officers would look into allegations of â€œnon-recentâ€ crimes, but refused to say which clubs it was investigating.

â€œWe take all the allegations we receive very seriously and they will be dealt with sensitively,â€ said DCS Ivan Balhatchet of the Metâ€™s sexual offences, exploitation and child abuse command. â€œAnyone who has been a victim of sexual abuse, whatever the circumstances, or has any relevant information should contact their local police or the NSPCC.â€

Football sex abuse scandal: how the story unfolded

According to police, more than 350 potential victims have come forward since the former Crewe defender Andy Woodward waived his right to anonymity to reveal in an interview with the Guardian that he had been a Âvictim of sexual abuse

Gary Johnson, the former player who was paid Â£50,000 by Chelsea not to go public with allegations that he was abused by their former chief scout Eddie Heath, has said that a personal apology from the clubâ€™s board, delivered in person on Wednesday, was â€œtoo little, too lateâ€.

Johnson was a member of Chelseaâ€™s first team from 1978 to 1981 after joining the club as an 11-year-old in 1970. The 57-year-old spoke out recently to say he was groomed from the age of 13 by Heath, who was chief scout from 1968 to 1979 and is now dead. Chelseaâ€™s insurers paid Â£50,000 in compensation, without liability, in return for a confidentiality clause.

Johnson told the BBC that the Â£50,000 he received was â€œnot enough for the pain and suffering Iâ€™ve hadâ€, adding: â€œIt [the abuse] took away my childhood â€" I can never get that back.â€

In Holyrood, Nicola Sturgeon resisted calls for the inquiry into historical child sexual abuse in Scotland to be widened to include football clubs, after the Scottish Labour leader, Kezia ÂDugdale, pressed her during first ministerâ€™s Âquestions about revelations of abuse in Scottish clubs.

The first minister said: â€œMy view is we should allow that inquiry to get on with its job and we should allow the police to get on with their job of investigating allegations of abuse in football.â€

Earlier, a former chief Âexecutive of the Scottish Football Association called for a separate inquiry as the revelÂations across the UK continued to mount. Gordon Smith told BBC Radioâ€™s Good Morning Scotland that an investigation into how clubs and national bodies had responded to allegations was needed.

â€œThere should be an inquiry, an inquiry into anybody who knew anything about this sort of thing,â€ he said. â€œIf this was happening at a club, what action did they take? Weâ€™re now finding out some of the cases down in England where the club tried to hush the situation, even paid a player money to not say anything about it.â€

The SFA has said it is part of a task force set up to coordinate complaints and information relating to child sexual abuse within football and that it is passing on all information it receives to Police Scotland.

Meanwhile, the Scottish Premiership club Patrick Thistle have admitted firing one of their employees in 1992 over abuse claims. The club disclosed that a former physiotherapist, named as John Hart, who died in 1995, was dismissed after the allegations came to light more than 20 years ago.

In a statement, the club denied any cover-up, stating: â€œThe current board and management knew nothing of this until an internal investigation uncovered it in the last few days. As a result, the club informed the SFA and Police Scotland.â€

This follows revelations concerning a former youth coach for Celtic, Hibernian and Falkirk football clubs, who was on Wednesday charged with a child sex offence and has been remanded in custody.

Jim McCafferty, who worked in football across the central belt of Scotland and in Ireland from the 1980s, was arrested in Belfast on Tuesday after presenting himself at a police station. He was charged with engaging in sexual activity with a child aged 13-16 between December 2011 and December 2014.

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Friday, December 9, 2016

Husband asks Mumsnet for advice on reviving his dwindling sex life

4:30 AM Bilal Muazin No comments

Who would you turn to if you were dissatisfied with your sex life?

One desperate husband asked MumsnetÂ for advice after he and his wife went from having sex twice a week to just once every six months after starting a family.

But some women were less than sympathetic towards the new father, who asked the mothers' forum how to broach the subject with his wife, with one telling him: 'You're not owed sex just because you want it.'

The man turned to Mumsnet for advice on broaching the subject of more sex with his wife

PseudoDad said he and his wife have only had sex five times since their son was conceived almost two-and-a-half years ago - they used to have sex twice a week

User PseudoDad wrote on the site: 'Since our son was conceived 2 1/2 years ago we have had sex just 5 times.Â

'Prior to this, we weren't at it like rabbits but I was very happy with twice a week.'

He said he wanted to broach the subject in a way that respected his 'wonderful' wife of six years, and asked: 'When is enough enough?'

His post received hundreds of replies, with women suggesting he do more housework, consider counselling, or simply 'accept that she might just not be interested right now'.

User AndShes Gone told the man it sounded as though he wasn't listening to his wife

Mumsnet user monkeysox was the first to reply when she asked him whether he was doing enough housework.Â Â

PseudoDad replied to insist he does his share, but another mum told him to 'accept that she might just not be interested right now and you have to grit your teeth until she feels she wants it again.

'You're not owed sex just because you want it,' said BravoPanda.Â

Another wrote: 'You're not listening.Â Sex is an action between 2 people. It's not you "giving her a break" or "waiting" for a year. And your "charm offensive" sounds fake or worse manipulative.'

Things began to cool down when a woman told the father that she could tell he was asking a 'genuine' question and admitted she'd struggle in his situation too

Mumsnet user Boundaries said: 'You can decide the relationship isn't for you, but the way you're talking? I'm not surprised your wife is backing off.'Â

But others had a more sympathetic response to his dilemma, with one user writing:Â 'I can tell you're asking a genuine question and you want this to work out well.'

Ilovetorrentialrain suggested he pursue counselling or sex therapy. Â

IcecreamRocks then said that despite not having the answer, they understood how he feltÂ

Honeylulu agreed the man was getting a 'hard time', adding that 'sex is the glue that binds a relationship together.Â

'That intimacy is a form of communication that will not (or should not) be present in any other relationships you have.'Â Â

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Husband asks Mumsnet for advice on reviving his dwindling sex life

8:30 AM Bilal Muazin No comments

Who would you turn to if you were dissatisfied with your sex life?

One desperate husband asked MumsnetÂ for advice after he and his wife went from having sex twice a week to just once every six months after starting a family.

Scroll down for videoÂ